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The Lower Blogosphere Burns with the Intensity of a Thousand Suns.

Thursday, November 17, 2005

Time is Fluxing

The temporal and gravametric stresses resulting from the utter implosion of the Burning Sub-Blogosphere are seeping into the Frozen Lower Blogosphere at a measureable rate of .21 chromatons per microsecond. The normal seepage rate is .00015 chromatons per milisecond. I don't think I need to exagerate the implications of this.

While the finest minds at Roboshrub Inc. are working around the clock to reverse this dillution of the spacial grid, I must (as the unquestioned master of the Frozen Lower Blogosphere) prepare for the worst. Evacuation plans are being devised even as we speak. Because we all know the consequences of not having an evacuation plan.

All citizens are advised to stock up on duct tape and water. Freedom is on the march.

There have been 7 Cries of Anguish:

Blogger Bob Dole maliciously intimated...

My Proposal:

1) Create an Ark.
2) Gather every sex.
3) Sail when the flood comes.
4) Die 5 months later from suffocation.
5) Let Bob Dole bury you.

11/18/2005 4:21 AM  
Blogger Adjuster maliciously intimated...

I couldn't help noticing that your entire blogoverse is about to self-destruct, perhaps leading citizens to turn their attention to the salvation of their immortal, digital souls--or at least their flat-screen plasma televisions.

I have several end-time insurance packages available at special "you should have thought of this earlier" rates.

Please send all inqueries to:

The Entime Adjuster c/o The Internet

11/18/2005 9:27 AM  
Blogger flatlander maliciously intimated...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

11/18/2005 9:29 AM  
Blogger flatlander maliciously intimated...

"Just like flies to a dead moose carcass, so too the Endtime Adjuster to a pending apocalypse."

from, the Book of Oldness, 13:27

11/18/2005 9:30 AM  
Blogger Gyrobo maliciously intimated...

Yes, unfortunately the collapse of the Sub-Blogosphere is causing massive force fielding in the Lower Blogosphere. Our only hope is for the scientists at Roboshrub Inc. to come up with a way to preven the collapse.

--==/ So sayeth the robot \==--

11/18/2005 1:14 PM  
Anonymous Moses Oldness maliciously intimated...

How dare you misquote the Book of Oldness.

-= So Sayeth the Mo'ldness =-

11/18/2005 1:17 PM  
Blogger Bhakti maliciously intimated...

I just read that you, Gyrobo, live somewhere South of the North Pole and North of the South Pole. Is it safe for me to assume that you live somewhere in between??

By the way, I've kidnapped you ( or should I say I've Robotnapped you!)...details to come!!

11/26/2005 1:55 PM  

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