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The Lower Blogosphere Burns with the Intensity of a Thousand Suns.

Friday, October 28, 2005

The Darkness Before the Dawn...

Election day has ended. The numbers have been tallied, and the results of this endeavor can be viewed here free of charge. Evidently, Gyrobo lost by a single vote. The sounds of cheers and laughter can be heard throughout the halls of the Evil Party compound, but at the Children of the Lower Blogosphere's headquarters, there is only silence. As the specter of evil creeps over the broken landscape of the Frozen Lower Blogosphere, it's hapless denizens are left wondering if their lives will be better now that the endless warfare and electoral campaigns are over.

When reached for comment, Gyrobo reportedly blamed his failure in the polls on those who voted for Ralph Nader. "Everyone knows those Nader votes were Gyrobo's. They stole the election!" remarked an anonymous Gyrobo staffer. Upon hearing rumors of voting impropriety, Evil Bob Dole spoke out against anyone who questioned his right to rule with an iron fist. "The system has once again prevailed. Gyrobo lost fair and square, and any attempt to overturn the results is just plain unconstitutional. Their claims of election fraud and any wrongdoing on our part is just untrue."

Unfazed by his loss, Gyrobo himself has pledged to take his case all the way to the Supreme Court of the Frozen Lower Blogosphere. Will his whining bear delicious electoral fruit? Only time will tell.

There have been 11 Cries of Anguish:

Blogger Gyrobo maliciously intimated...

Curse you, Evil Bob Dole! I'll take this all the way to the Supreme Court! You hear me?! The Supreme Court!!!

10/28/2005 10:35 PM  
Anonymous Al Gore maliciously intimated...

Forget about it,

Even I'll admit that you Lost.

10/28/2005 10:45 PM  
Anonymous George W. Bush maliciously intimated...

My friend Chief Justice Roberts won't allow a recount Mr. Robot.

10/28/2005 10:51 PM  
Blogger Gyrobo maliciously intimated...

Ha ha! The Supreme Court of the United States has no jurisdiction over the Frozen Lower Blogosphere! The FLB falls under the domain of

The Board of Judicial Justice and Funny Hats.

And I know the Chief Justice himself! We go golfing on Tuesdays.

10/28/2005 11:02 PM  
Anonymous Judicial Board Chairman maliciously intimated...

Our fishing trip is over.

Your case is dismissed!

10/28/2005 11:18 PM  
Blogger Karl the Sorcerer maliciously intimated...

Fool! I, Karl the Socerer, am the Chief Justice of the Board of Judicial Justice and Funny Hats!

This case will be decided under my watchfull supervision, without outside interference. Is that understood?!?

Sir, yes, sir!

10/28/2005 11:47 PM  
Blogger Roboshrub Incorporated maliciously intimated...

Ignore the man behind the curtain!

10/28/2005 11:48 PM  
Anonymous EBD Supporter maliciously intimated...

And so the old saying goes...

"If you don't like how things turned out, then create another identity to contest the decision."

10/28/2005 11:58 PM  
Blogger Karl the Sorcerer maliciously intimated...

I have reviewed the case, and hereby decided that Gyrobo has no case. The Election Results stand.

10/29/2005 1:31 AM  
Anonymous The Townsfolk maliciously intimated...

Hoooray! Democracy Prevails!

10/29/2005 1:34 AM  
Blogger Karl the Sorcerer maliciously intimated...

Imposter! The REAL Karl the Sorcerer has a blogger profile of 14667270. The OTHER Karl has a profile of 14767983. You are decidedly NOT me!

10/31/2005 9:21 AM  

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