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The Lower Blogosphere Burns with the Intensity of a Thousand Suns.

Thursday, November 03, 2005

The High Court Reaches Verdict

As the Chief Justice of the Board of Judicial Justice and Funny Hats, I, Karl √úberdale, find both Lord Gyrobo the Awesome and Evil Bob Dole... guilty! Due to their use of fraud, I sentence both of those fools to the eternal fires of the Burning Sub-Blogosphere! And in another sweeping move, I hereby ban Gyrobo's lackey Roboshrub from the Frozen Lower Blogosphere! The corporate reach of Roboshrub Incorporated cannot be allowed to penetrate the free markets of the Lower Blogosphere, under constitutional precedent 123-5B. As Chief Justice, I am now the de facto ruler of the Frozen Lower Blogosphere. The Anonymi will serve as my primary advisers.

This case is now ended, the execution of said sentence to be carried out immediately.

There have been 11 Cries of Anguish:

Anonymous Harriet Miers maliciously intimated...

Judicial activism, tyranny, IMPEACH THE JUDGE!
Well, he cant be worse than the other two.

11/04/2005 3:24 AM  
Anonymous Nostradomous maliciously intimated...

Evil Bob Dole is innocent!

11/04/2005 8:28 AM  
Blogger Bob Dole maliciously intimated...

This court has absolutely no authority over my antithesis, Evil Bob Dole, and I hereby demand that we have a new trial.

I understand that the top of the appeals is the Supreme Court of this Blogosphere, but there are other Blogospheres out there who have more credibility.

I, therefor, would encourage the Chief Justice of this Court, to politely recuse himself in order for the verdit to be widely accepted with a new Judicial process.

Thank you,
- The Undersigned:

Bob Dole,
Evil Bob Dole,
Ross Perot,
Ralph Nader,
Al Sharpton,
President Bush,
and Barnie the Dog.

11/04/2005 3:00 PM  
Anonymous huddled masses maliciously intimated...

Hooray for Dole!!

Recuse yourself!

11/04/2005 3:01 PM  
Anonymous GOD maliciously intimated...

I have to agree with the Former Senator.

- GOD.

P.S. Karl, I know what you did with those bodies in the ocean!

11/04/2005 3:02 PM  
Blogger Michael maliciously intimated...

inally! We can see some normalcy back in the Lower Blogsphere.

11/04/2005 3:17 PM  
Blogger Roboshrub Incorporated maliciously intimated...

Karl, you're a dead man. I know people.

I'm leaving. But you cannot hold back the waters of progress with your dams of... authority? That metaphor really fell apart.


11/04/2005 4:01 PM  
Blogger Frida maliciously intimated...


11/04/2005 4:57 PM  
Anonymous John Definately-Not-Roboshrub Smith maliciously intimated...

This is a blasted injustice! How can you claim you speak with the voice of a democracy! You can't! Because you've not been elected!

11/04/2005 10:24 PM  
Blogger flatlander maliciously intimated...

Blogosphere politics is a tricky and turbulent business. I wouldn't want to be in Gyrobo's robotic shoe-wheel thingy.

11/06/2005 1:59 PM  
Blogger flatlander maliciously intimated...

I guess it's more of a spring, rather than a wheel. But the whole metaphor breaks down:

"I wouldn't want to be attached to his spring"

"Don't judge someone unless you've locomoted a mile on his spring"

Anyways, the future of the Lower Frozen Blogosphere is in Gyrobo', wirey appendages.

11/07/2005 11:02 AM  

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